A Collection of Thoughts

Kids In Mind - Movie Ratings

I have blogged about this site before but I thought it was worth mentioning again when one of my readers asked if I thought that Smurfs would be too scary for her little one.

Kids In Mind reviews movies ( and has since 1992) giving each one a rating for the level of  gore profanity sex nudity and violence. It goes so far as to say things like - 

• A man and a woman kiss briefly twice.
• I'll be Smurfed (I'll be damned or darned)

So as a parent you can readily determine if the movie would be appropriate for your little ones and not so little ones.

I use it all the time especially as my two are heading to the tween years  They still love the traditional kids movies but they are also at an age where they like ones with more grown up themes and its a bit tricky to gage sometimes. I find the PG rating a little too vague. On the radar for us at the moment is 

  Zoo Keeper - which has been reviewed here

 

 

 

 

Monte Carlo - which has been reviewed here

Spy Kids  4 -which has been reviewed here

Don't forget they have a huge database so its not just the latest releases.

Hope that helps you with your holiday viewing!

 

 

 

Music Recommendations

Thank you to everyone who came to my what should I listen to request :) So much to choose from and I have really enjoyed listening to all the snippets.

Thanks to my twitter mate Georgette who taught me how to add songs to my wish list on itunes - I now have more set up and ready to hit buy when the next itunes card offer appears :) I am keeping an eye out - Big W often have them.

This is what you came up with that I have added :)

• Sunshine Goodtime - Pretty Baby
• IceDream - Pretty Baby
• I Can - Pretty Baby
• Cameo Lover - Vows
• Coin Laundry - Wonder
• Clean White Love - Wonder
• Neopolitan Dreams - Wonder
• Daniel - Two Suns
• Mace Spray - Dark Storm - EP
• Titanium (feat. Sia) - Nothing But the Beat
• You Are for Me - Kari Jobe
• Get Away Jordon - Introspection
• Into the West - Into the West
• Harmony to My Heartbeat - Ministry of Sound Chillout Sessions XIII
• Beautiful Day - Adam (Original Motion Picture Soundtrack)
• Always Be - Odd Place to Be - EP
• The Climb - The Climb - Single
• Love Song - Little Voice
• Bubbly - Bubbly - EP
• Like a Star - Corinne Bailey Rae
• Put Your Records On - Corinne Bailey Rae
• On the Radio - Begin to Hope
• Better - Rock On 
• Maybe Tomorrow - Riverhead
• Golden Dawn - Riverhead
• Northern Lights - Riverhead
• Something In the Water - Flags 
• Ride - The Jasmine Flower
• Turn the Compass Round - 300 Days At Sea (Deluxe Version)
• Thank You, Stars - The Katie Melua Collection
• Keep Breathing - Be OK

One of my favourites on this list is - Miley Cyrus - The Climb. It was on my run list  ( hence why I never ran fast LOL !)  but it's appropriate for now.

 and here are a list of artists or recommended albums too that I am yet to check out.

Priscilla Ahn, Ingrid Michaelson, Brooke Fraser, Norah Jones, Kim Williams of Jesus Culture, Third Day, kd Lang, Faith Hill, Jewel, Marie Wilson, Missy Higgins, Natalie Grant, Sara Groves, Regina Spektor, Meiko, Feist, Imogen Heap, Kate Nas Vanessa Carlton, Mindy Gledhill, Kimbra, Owl Eyes, Gypsy Kings, Martina Topley Bird

Hope it helps you if you are looking for a new playlist too:)

You guys are the best!

The Circus is In Town

Yesterday as I was heading to my MRI I noticed a circus set up at Parklands:)

I quickly text Richard - Let's go to the circus ... ( I wasn't driving )

He didn't reply.

I knew he'd be thinking far out it's footy night it's my birthday surely I can just watch the footy in peace.

I text him again - It'll be fun

He ignored me.

I text him again - the girls would love it - It will be such a nice surprise.

He ignored me.

I text Mel - I want to go to the circus and Richard is ignoring me.

Mel text him -  I think you should take Tamar and the girls to the circus tonight Richard.

Finally he replied- OK 

We had the BEST time.

I have been to three circuses in my life and this was my favourite. The other two have been a bit umm well manky and unclean but this one was amazing. They had so many different animals- My favourite was two very clever beautiful macaw birds and the calibre of performance was really awesome. Even the clowns - the humour was funny and not too crass which makes me squirm and they were very talented performers as well keeping us entertained with their clever juggling and tumbling- very funny!

The show ran for two hours with a small intermission.

The only thing I was sad about was that there was no fairy floss on a stick - you know when they make it fresh it's so good? I had already decided that if they had it I was so going to have some. They only had it in a bag :(

They did however have a teacup ride which I wanted to go on too.  The girls loved it.

If you are a local then I highly recommend it - there are different seating costs - we took the elevated ones ( which was the one up from the cheapest ) and we chose the sides - which I think was better than the front - when you are at the front you have tent poles in front of you - we had the BEST view. Oh and if you go at night take a cardigan I was a little cool in the second half.

Show times and ticket prices here. If you end up going do let  me know what you thought!

PS photos on my phone using instagram -

Stages of Breast Cancer - Staging Finished

From today until Thursday at 9.30am when I have my oncologist visit I have no Dr appointments or Dr things to do (apart from drop my scans off- but that doesn't involve hard conversations or needles or machines)- YAY

All the staging is done. All the results are in and now it's up to the experts to make some decisions on which cocktail of drugs they want to use and when to start.

So far this is what we know for sure.

I have two types ( which is common ) 

Ductal carcinoma in situ (DCIS)-  The most common type of noninvasive breast cancer. Cancer cells inside the ducts do not spread through the walls of the ducts into the fatty tissue of the breast.

and

Infiltrating (or invasive) Ductal Carcinoma (IDC) Starting in a milk passage, or duct, of the breast, this cancer breaks through the wall of the duct and invades the breast’s fatty tissue. It can spread to other parts of the body through the lymphatic system and through the bloodstream.

It's the IDC that they work on treating as it's the nasty stuff.

The good news from all my staging is that so far it is confined to my breast at best guess- That means there are no tumours anywhere else and there is nothing in my bones :) - This is awesome news.

There is no way to confirm though that some cells haven't escaped - mostly they escape through lymph nodes but they can also just escape. My lymphs won't be checked until surgery which is some time off yet.

My breast surgeon wants to do neoadjuvant chemotherapy - which basically means he wants chemo first to attempt to shrink the tumour before he operates.

On Thursday I meet with my Oncologist who my Breast Surgeon sends 95% of his patients to so it's unlikely they won't agree this is the best plan of action. Unless the  biopsy tissue and the MRI have shown anything new.

The only other thing that we don't have any information on yet is the hormone receptor status. This is determined from the biopsy tissue. My surgeon sent away for this on Tuesday so I will soon hear the "style" of cancer that we are working with and what drugs it will respond to. If you want more info on what that means this website is easy to follow.

It's all just a waiting game or as my radiologist described it - It's a stair case.

I'm on the third step at the moment - he told me there were many more to go yet and sometimes when you think you are almost there more get added.

For those of you who just want my health updates you can click the topic of Breast Cancer in the side bar and that will just give you the posts related to that. For the next few days my blog will remain cancer discussion free but I wanted to bring you all up to date one where we are and thank you once again for the amazing support.

Richard and I know we aren't walking this journey alone.

 

 

 

 

Waking Moments

via weheartit.com

Each morning for just a few waking moments before my brain engages with the day I have forgotten.

And then suddenly it floods back and I forget to breathe.

One day at a time.

 

Happy Birthday - Richard

Today my husband turns 42.

He says he is really cross with me.

You see September in our house is what is known as Grasshoper month.  Richard says that he slowly gathers his brownie points all year for September  -  Father's Day  Birthday and Footy Finals. He says it's his month to be kicking back and enjoying his hard work from the year.

Not to be this year unfortunately.

Today he has to work and inbetween work he will spend his day running the girls to my grandparents, dropping me off for my MRI, talking to our insurance company - yet again, and the bank (sigh) and then for fun he's going to have a chat to the Cancer Council. He may even call into Medicare if he has enough time.

Breast Cancer so far hasn't been much fun for me - but I'm guessing it's not much fun for him either.

Tomorrow we will however leave it behind us for a few hours and go to dinner with our closest friends. I intend to make him a birthday cake or my girls will.

and we will attempt to remember for a while it is his grasshopper time.

He tells me 2012 will be grasshopper month August and September so I had better be fit and ready :)

I intend to be.

 

 

Asking for Some Help :)

My lovely readers I have so much to say and share but tonight all I have the energy for is to ask for a little bit of help.

Long time readers of my blog will know that I am music challenged - BIG Time.

I once shared my running playlist and got told in no uncertain words that I was clueless.

And yep they are right.

via weheartit.com

I need a few playlists for late at night when my brain won't stop, for when I'm reading and documenting, for when I'm sitting waiting, for when I'm pacing, for when I'm walking. I need distraction.

I like soft happy easy listening - I prefer girls to boys.

I really like Lenka (I have one of her albums ) if that gives you any indication :)

Can you please send me your recommendations?  To be honest I like just songs not so much albums so I would love to be able to create a big list that I can download from itunes and then load to my ipod and then I can skip through depending on how I am feeling.

and for my Christian readers please share your favourites too :)

Pop your comments here or email me :)

Thank you in advance

 

 

Magazines and Mama Mia

The girls love those tweenie magazines - they cost like $5.95 and I can't work out the release cycle but it inevitably coincides with a visit with their PohPoh who is naughty and often gives them $10 each just because that's what Grandmas do.

SIGH

Anyhow - they love them. Filled with gossip about their favourite stars, a recipe or two, some craft, the latest trends in lipgloss, important details about Justin Beibers favourite colour and so on - you get the idea.

I often have a quick look but really don't take much notice. Until the other day Tals says Mummy have a look at this Katy Perry looks weird.

And sure enough on the front cover - is Katy photoshopped to within an inch of her life- actually I would argue beyond her life.

I grabbed the mag to look through and most of the images to be fair are not photoshopped but seriously?  I was so cross I did something I have never done before and I sent an email off to Mia Freeman and her team as photoshopping and images in magazines is something she regulary highlights.

Imagine my surprise to find my quickly worded email up on her site -in her Open Post of the week - here

along with the advice to watch this great resource from Dove which I had totally forgotten about.

The girls and I have watched it now a couple of times together and I overheard them telling Richard all about it. The eyes are the bit that get to me - the way they open her eyes.

Needless to say I'm more aware now about what they are reading/viewing and while I still allow them we are discussing the images.

 

Stages of Breast Cancer - Staging

If I thought that the first stage took forever I wish the second stage could have.

It's the staging where you know you have cancer but they need to work out the details and the nature of the beast.

All situations are different but from what I had read and what my GP had told me it would most likely be surgery and then follow up treatment which could take many forms.

So he organized for a CT scan to check that there was nothing else lurking anywhere

and a bone scan - same reason and a meeting with a surgeon.

Friday - the very next day I received a call to say they weren't waiting for the breast surgeon I was to go in an hour to have the body scan - I dropped everything and went.

For me that was the scary part. The lump I could feel I knew it was there. But what did I not know about ?

6.30 Friday evening I received a call from the Dr to say my scan had showed up clear - nothing anywhere else. For the first time I started to breathe.

Next part of staging is the surgeon.

That was today.

Thank you to my twitter and blogging mates who text and emailed I owe many emails.

8.15 this morning. I was calm I understood the words on my reports. I had googled.

I'd even come up with a treatment plan.

It was a good one I thought based on what I had read and comparing my results with many others on message boards.

I was so clever.

I reassured everyone it'll all be fine. Just this then this I'll be back at work and this blip will be over before we know.

I was wrong.

I didn't take into account that I am not a Dr and apparently cancer doesn't follow rules.

Today my lovely Dr who is not my friend - I told him that-  re scanned and that feral feral lump has grown and he can't operate until it has shrunk.

So I'm facing chemotherapy, a lumpectomy another round of chemotherapy then radiation then further hormone treatment depending on what the cancer responds to which we will know once my biopsy is reassessed. 12 months of treatment if everything goes to plan. If not he assured me he would make a new plan. He has lots of them.

I didn't say no this time because I didn't see this coming. I had no words.

Apparently Dr Google isn't very good.

Richards looking after all the words and pieces of paper, dealing with the phone calls and paying all the bills - oh my they are scary and I have friends in place to drive me to everything I have to go to and my job is to just sit and be.

Next  is bone scan on Thursday and Friday is my MRI - I asked for sedation. I have had enough of trying to work it all out myself.

Taking one day at a time. Thank you for walking with me.

 

Stages of Breast Cancer - Diagnosis

I didn't know there were stages- I just knew there was a lot of waiting and the waiting seems forever but then it's not and the time that has passed is infinitely short.

The first stage is the diagnosis

I found a lump two Sunday evenings ago as I lay on my stomach and thought ow what's that?

Monday I went to my GP and said what do you think this is ? I said it hurts. He said  I don't know let's find out and sent me for a ultra sound and mammogram

Thursday ( yes a long wait ) I  finally get in. 20 minutes in the radiographer - the lady who does the scan says get dressed you are all good to go just a little cyst you'll be fine I'll just check with the DR. I text Richard all clear going back to work Ill see you tonight.

Ive already switched to the next thing on my to do list.

2 minutes later the Dr appears and says Its not a cyst it doesn't look good and explained why - the shape the size the position some shadows and pointed them all out to me - All I could see was a blob and nothing else. He said he wanted a core biopsy and it was 75 % more likely to be nasty than not.

 What ??  Where did my cyst go ?? At that stage I left my body and it was many days before I was to return.

So where do you go to get a core biopsy? At the same place with the same doctor who just told me the 75% news.... But you know got to love medicare and the system - I had to go back to my GP to be referred back for the Biopsy ??

I couldn't get an appointment with my GP so I had to wait till Saturday - I cried - Richard yelled at people but no appointment was coming.

Friday I stayed home from work and waited for a slot to open up. and it did.   I hoped my Gp would not see the same things on the scan and tell me that the other Dr was wrong.

He didn't.

He said prepare for the worst and sent me back for my biopsy.

Wednesday.

And so I waited and googled and prepared.

Wednesday came and the biopsy was done - I was told 48 hours for results.

And suddenly time moved infinitely faster.

So fast.

Richard met me in the driveway phone in hand as I pulled in Thursday afternoon from work.

They said come now.

and so we did . 

A two minute drive knowing and yet not knowing.

We could tell by the way our Dr moved and didn't make eye contact as he called  the patients ahead of us. But still we sat not wanting to know yet knowing.

I madly sent texts to keep busy to friends saying its got to be good right? results coming in early? They didn't have to do many tests? - and I got no replies. They knew too.

My Dr pulled the report up on his screen and took his time before he started but the words I had spent days before googling and preparing jumped out in 3D.

 carcinoma invasive high grade

I said No. Don't you say those words to me and left. Richard stayed and heard the story while I paced.

Finally we heard the story together.

Friday I returned to work and shared the news and packed my desk and took indefinite leave.

Diagnosis took 13 days.